Chris Misses Workout...Wags and Millican Dominate Legs
Thursday was a brutal day in the HOP. I could barely drag my ass out of bed, let alone workout...or so I thought. I nearly cancelled but the thought of BJ standing on my porch for an hour before leaving was unnacceptable, so I got up. Millican felt the same way but we trudged down the stairs to the dungeon and tore that place up. After getting some motivation from a little Trick Daddy and some old school White Zombie I was ready to rock. We circuited Dumbbell jump squats, calf raises, walking lunges and also hit triceps at the end. This was all coming off the most impressive upper body workout we have had so far on Wednesday. Nutrition is going well, all the coworkers are in awe as I pack away three meals at work, chicken breasts, baked potatoes and broccoli are a staple. When I am asked what is in my protein drink I simply reply "some illegal THG with a little other home brew", that usually shuts the fatties up.
Some sad news to report out of the HOP as well. As you noticed I didn't mention Chris's name in the above workout. This is because the pansy never showed up. Apparently BJ and I are the only ones who are truly committed to the House. I am sorry to say that I will be forced to review his membership if this happens again. No call, no show, no ripped muscles! If I have to drag my tired ass out of bed and workout because I think those guys will be waiting on my porch and he is no there...there will be a termination of a gym membership.
The dues for the membership are simple as are the rules of the gym so let me review.
Blood, Sweat and Tears are due upon arrival. This is a lifetime membership...blood in, blood out. There will be no talking about glutes or abs in the gym.
You will not be allowed to mention Bowflex...unless in a derogatory manner.
No Swiss Balls alllowed.
NO ab machines, rollers or any other "gadget machines" are allowed.
If you miss a workout, you will be ridiculed on this blog mercilessly and your membership may be suspended.
Now post away and let the world know how utterly ridiculous Chris is for missing a workout.
Some sad news to report out of the HOP as well. As you noticed I didn't mention Chris's name in the above workout. This is because the pansy never showed up. Apparently BJ and I are the only ones who are truly committed to the House. I am sorry to say that I will be forced to review his membership if this happens again. No call, no show, no ripped muscles! If I have to drag my tired ass out of bed and workout because I think those guys will be waiting on my porch and he is no there...there will be a termination of a gym membership.
The dues for the membership are simple as are the rules of the gym so let me review.
Blood, Sweat and Tears are due upon arrival. This is a lifetime membership...blood in, blood out. There will be no talking about glutes or abs in the gym.
You will not be allowed to mention Bowflex...unless in a derogatory manner.
No Swiss Balls alllowed.
NO ab machines, rollers or any other "gadget machines" are allowed.
If you miss a workout, you will be ridiculed on this blog mercilessly and your membership may be suspended.
Now post away and let the world know how utterly ridiculous Chris is for missing a workout.
posted by "Wags" at 5:55 PM
6 Comments:
Wow, you guys work out together. That's exciting.
I can think of a hundred things I'd rather be doing early in the morning than working out with two dudes.
Like eating a chili cheese dog while you pleasure yourself to another episode Dallas in your filthy bed? Keep up the forearm workout you fatty
Wags...you disgust me...What man in his right mind would watch the old 80's show Dallas...that's like JR Ewing stuff isn't it?
I bet during workouts you do the whole..."Who Shot JR" bit with your hands...and your workout friends chuckle.
How long has that show been cancelled you loser.
Try watching a more mainstream show like American Idol. You could learn a thing or two from Constantine--the clear front runner and most talented singer in the bunch.
With your workout shakes and all the other "nutrients" you take...is getting bigger really better when you're just losing size your sack.
Let it be known that Jock watches Dallas every day on the soap channel in his office. His nascar fantasy team name...EwingOil. American Idol huh? Don't even get me started, and if you want to know what we do at the HOP then get off your fat, jabba the hut lookin ass and get down there. Sack shrinkage? You have clearly been watching "Steroid Madness", the governemt scare tactic film on roid use. Im sure you think that steroids can kill you and give you brain tumors too. Get a life, workout, quit watching Dallas, read a book about the juice and get off my back. As good ole JR would say "You are a lush and a loser" Wags-OUT
Of course there's no talk of glutes or abs in your gym. It would be like talking about automobiles in a world without cars!
Let me tell you what I'm doing that early in the morning while you bowls of lard are drinking your "man gravy" shakes and doing leg lunges........ I'm busy laying in my king size looking at my king size!! That's right party people, the only leg lifts I do are the "3rd leg" lifts, if you know what I mean. My manliness is something to be reckoned with!!
Large Geet.............OUT!
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